summer comes with its color all to take your breath away

so long snuggling, movies, and endless naps. i'm back in nashville. bennett won't be back until next weekend, so i only have to wait one more week until my summer can officially start. i feel like making a list. so here are the highlights of this past week with bennett in tampa:

• sleeping until the afternoon
• double stuf oreos
• hot-tub
  
• long naps
• so much snuggling
• belly rubs
• poker with his family (and almost winning)
• new music from iron & wine and grizzly bear
• cali yogurt
• going to a wedding
• getting to see bennett play at a wedding
• watching a thousand movies (or tristan + isolde, when nietzsche wept, x-men origins: wolverine, tuck everlasting, moulin rouge, angels & demons, and up)

traveling mercies

today was such a wonderful day. bennett was feeling so much better so we were able to get out of the house. we went to the movie theater and saw up, which i highly recommend (although i have to warn you, i cried after the first 10 minutes or so, and yes, i know it is a childrens movie). then after dinner we went to cali yogurt and made a list of everything we're going to do together this summer as we sat outside eating our pink grapefruit yogurt.

then tonight, as we sat outside on the dock, i was reminded of how blessed i am. despite everything we have gone through this year, every surgery and every doctors apointment, we have eachother. everything will be ok. in the book i am reading called traveling mercies, the author says this:

when a lot of things start going wrong all at once, it is to protect something big and lovely that is trying to get itself born--and that this something needs for you to be distracted so that it can be born as perfectly as possible.

every time bennett has a headache or doesn't feel well, my heart breaks. it scares me more than anything. but i have to have faith that he will be ok. all of this is happening for a reason. something so big and so wonderful is going to come into our lives, and we just have to be distracted for a little bit so it can be perfect. i am blessed. i have loved more than some people ever get to love in their lifetime. i can't take that for granted.

still in florida

i apologize for the lack of posts.
we were supposed to come back to nashville yesterday, but because of bennett's headaches we are sticking around for a few more days for more doctors appointments and what not. i am so ready for this all to be over.

weekend

be back monday : )

have a wonderful weekend!

i know i will.

5 wonderful things:

• seedless watermelon
• temporary tattoos
• fresh squeezed lemonade
• the sound a polaroid camera makes when you take a photo
• love

tomorrow

22 more hours....

lovely day

today i was walking around outside while talking to bennett on the phone and i spotted the most lovely thing. so of course i ran inside to get my camera, because that way i can keep it with me forever. look, it's a heart! there was just one little yellow leaf growing among all the green.

tomorrow is going to be wonderful because i am baby sitting in the morning, selling paletas in the afternoon, and then going to bed really really early so i can wake up and fly to bennett! hooray!

four paletas

today was a good day.

i ate four paletas

(strawberry banana, grapefruit, chocolate mint, and watermelon)

and ate a whole sleeve of saltine crackers

which is my favorite snack.

my belly is very happy.

and i watched doubt which i very much enjoyed.

then i got to video chat with this boy...

but i really don't like saltine crumbs on my bed sheets. no matter how hard i try to brush them all off they just don't seem to completely go away.

i don't like crowds

tonight i went to my friends graduation at my old high school and it was loud and crowded 

and i couldn't even move so i started to freak out 

because i hate being around tons of people,

it makes me so scared,

and i just wanted to find a quiet corner but there wasn't one

and girls are just plain mean

and i am so glad i'm not in high school anymore.

all i want to do is cuddle with bennett

and he will kiss my forehead and my freckle by my nose

and rub my belly

and tell me that everything's ok.

but he is two states away

and i miss him so much it makes my heart hurt.

i don't like night time.

lonely day

it is the rainiest of days. i woke up at noon and didn't feel like doing anything, so i got back in bed and have been looking at blogs for quite some time now. i've been a little bit lonely today, but it's kind of nice, in a way. the dreary weather and the loneliness seem to compliment each other. here are some highlights for this cloudy day:

• i made a list of more things i need to get for my apartment. i'm getting restless. i just want to move in already. 
• my best friend since the 7th grade is coming home tonight! she makes me laugh more than anyone. 
  
• i found my dream wedding dress. it is incredible. i just have to find it for much cheaper somewhere...
• bennett wants a teacup pig. i don't know how i feel about this yet.
• the 8 year old i babysit called me today and we had a conversation about lemonade stands, video games, planetariums, and thunderstorms.
• i'm listening to thirteen by ben kweller, one of my favorite songs. this isn't much of a highlight though because it just makes me miss bennett a whole lot.

that's all for now. here is one of my favorite photos.

one more thing

don't ever watch p.s. i love you when you're missing someone. that would be a terrible idea. my eyes hurt from crying and i just want to go to sleep. that is all.

my love

i really miss you right now.

quite a lot, actually.

just one more week...

eureka!

so i have been wondering why it has been hard for me lately to post on the blog, and today i figured it out. i am terrible at organizing my thoughts. terrible. so every time i sit down and try to make an organized post about one thing, it just doesn't work. i end up wanting to write about something i'm looking forward to, what i ate for lunch, how i saw a really cute pregnant lady, and then i'll throw in a picture of bennett because he's my favorite. so after i had this realization, i decided that it's ok. some people have a way with words. i am not one of those people. so from now on i am content with the fact that my posts might be a jumbled mess of random thoughts.

my 4 favorite things right now are:

• bennett (of course)
• my clean room that i spent all day organizing
• last night's episode of LOST
• sigur ros

going home

i am now sitting in my empty dorm room. i thought this day would never come, but it has arrived and i couldn't be happier. or more exhausted. in the past 24 hours i have packed up both mine and bennett's rooms, made trip after trip to load the cars, and then unloaded everything at my house. then i had to take bennett to the airport because he's going home for a couple weeks, and i hate taking him to the airport because it makes me so sad. but he'll be back before i know it (which is actually not true because the days will go by so slow and i will probably cry more than once, but saying that makes me feel better).

so, now i'm going home for a month and then i get to move into my apartment! i'm going to hit up the flea market and every garage sale i come across to get ready for the move in. but for now, when i'm not working at the popsicle shop, i plan on spending all my time with my terribly attractive sister:

mother's day

being sick is the worst. bennett and i laid in bed for 7 hours yesterday and tried to watch episodes of the office online despite our constant coughing and nose blowing. however, it was nice to both be sick so we could cuddle and feel miserable together. but then i wake up this morning to find out i have a sinus infection and the beginning of an ear infection. boo.

on a happier note, it's mother's day! i'm going home tonight to eat dinner with the family because i unfortunately couldn't make it to church with them this morning. i realized today that i really don't tell my mom enough how much i love her. she is incredible. she would do absolutely anything for me and my sisters. i forget sometimes how much she does for us and how blessed i am. so here's a reminder to you and to myself: make sure you take the time to tell those you love how much they mean to you. life is short.

happy mother's day mom!

done

i had my last final today! it was art history... and a lot harder than i expected (yikes). however, i am done and there's no sense in worrying about it now! 

hello summer.

one year ago...

so one year ago today, bennett took me on our first date. it was quite wonderful because we ate at carrabba's, took some cheesecake to the park and had a night-time picnic, watched jurassic park, talked for hours, and then watched the sunrise. i'm surprised he even asked me out on a second date because i was so nervous i barely ate any of the food he bought me and i accidentally blew a dandelion right in his face. so here are some of the reasons why he is my favorite person in the world...

• he reads to me
• he thinks it's cute how i have to organize my candy by color and flavor
• he took me to the beach for one day (that's 16 hours of driving in about 30 hours)
• he likes snuggling as much as i do
• he doesn't make me sing in front of him
• he says i look the prettiest right after i wake up and that my hair looks best when i haven't showered
• for valentine's day he got me a dinosaur for each day of the week. i keep them in my backpack
• he likes to kiss the freckle beside my nose
• he wrote me a ukulele love song
• he thinks i'm an artist, and i think he's brilliant
• sometimes he gives me his shirt so i can smell him as i fall asleep
• he is always there for me when i freak out and have panic attacks for no good reason
• his eyelids and hands are my favorite

i love him more than comforters, happy meals, belly rubs and candy.

happiness

today, i was featured on the blog that inspired me to start my own! when naomi wrote a post asking people to e-mail her a list of 10 things that make them terribly happy, i just couldn't resist (since, after all, making lists is my favorite, as is rockstar diaries). 

so check out my little list here!

rain rain go away

today is so dreary. business at the popsicle shop is going to be slow. i suppose people just don't want to get out in this nasty weather (although in my opinion a popsicle is exactly what one would need on a rainy day like today). i am making lists to help pass the time. a shopping list, a to do list, a "what i still need for the apartment" list, etc. 

oh, and one year ago today bennett asked me out on our first date. did you know that i am the luckiest girl in the world?

ugh.

it's finals week. luckily, because of all my studio art classes, i don't have any 10 page papers due (sorry bennett) but i do have to:

• clean and sign collagraphs for printmaking, organize notes, and finish sketches
• finish 3d design final project
• finish clay box
• study for art history final

and of course i have to pack up all of my things to finally move out of the dorm. i couldn't be more excited. farewell tiny bed and noisy neighbors!

the sea and the rhythm

sometimes we decide to go on beach adventures. they are my favorite.